Am I Afraid To Write?

By C.L. Martin

Am I afraid to put my writing out there? The answer is a resounding Yes!

While building the foundation for Inner Inspirations it became increasingly clear my fears could put a grinding halt to any future my blog had, again! I put such lofty expectations on what my blog should be and what I thought others would want it to be that I started to become overwhelmed and lost sight of my dreams.

'What is the point if I can't even get a first paragraph down?'

Instead of giving up, I decided to do what I do best, research, and more research. I wanted to see if fear was a common hurdle that new bloggers face or if my own unique insecurities were holding me back. I discovered that it's a combination of both.

It became obvious a lot of new writers face some kind of hesitation about putting their work out there. Fear of the audience's opinions, fear that their writing skills are not up to par, fear that they will get lost in an "Over saturated field", even fear of failure seemed to be commonplace. Each one of these fears struck a chord with me.

As I began to think on each of these and how they compared to my own I realized that fear is a relative thing. Everyone has self-doubt and fears of some kind, be it in their professional or personal lives. Everyone has those moments where they begin to feel like they are not the best fit for whatever they are trying to do.

'If fear is so common is it part of the process?' For some this is true.

'Is it for me?'

The next day I sat down at my computer and began to think about what I was so afraid of. If I could put names to my fears than overcoming them would be a little easier. (For me anyway.) I made this list:

• Fear of what others will think.

• Fear of not being good enough.

• Professional Intimidation

And the biggest one of all

• fear of failure.

I had my list and I began to look at each one of these fears in depth. A decision needed to get made. Was I going to allow my writing career to once again be destroyed before it even began?

The Answer?

NO!

Instead, I made my fears work for me. I turned them into something that could help others look at their own professional fears (and even personal ones). In return, I began to see how I could start to overcome my own.

I broke down each fear, again, in written words. I was able to better understand what each fear looked like and how I could overcome them. It looked like

FEAR OF WHAT OTHERS WILL THINK!

Every one has an opinion! Yes even me.

Will the occasional negative feed back I receive out weigh the positive feed back? I will never know unless I leap.

I can't continue to let the fear of what others will think of my writing stop me from sharing my voice. Along the way I may come across those who will try to tear me down, but how many others could I help? That is worth overcoming my fear of judgment.

Letting those negative voices stop me from being a positive voice in someone else's life didn't seem like a good enough reason not to jump in feet first, so I moved on.

AM I GOOD ENOUGH?

'

How good is anyone at anything when they begin?'

No one starts out reading well. Why am I expecting myself to start out writing good?

Why are we expected to be good at anything that we have never done before?

The expectations to be perfect before I even get started aren't coming from those around me. They are ones I have placed on myself.

I may not be good at this now but with time and practice I will get better. Will I ever be the best blogger the world has seen? No probably not, but that is not my goal. My goal is to use my voice to encourage others to follow their dreams, and to bring a little light into the lives of others.

Today I want to be the best I am right now, and for me that is "Good Enough"

I was good enough to start. That is all that mattered. But was I as good as other writers? Professional Writers?

PROFESSIONAL INTIMIDATION!

I am a new writer. I have not had any paid jobs and by definition am not a professional but that doesn't mean I can't be professional.

The research I have spent countless hours combing through has given me the knowledge I need to conduct myself Professionally. My past work experience has taught me how to interact with clients professionally. I can treat my followers with respect. Also, an aspect of being professional. Professionalism isn't based on the quality of my work alone.

Being professional means more to me than the quality of work I put out. It has become a part of my character, developed through my years of experience.

My confidence in my self and my abilities should not been swayed because of my income status or the concept that other writers are making money. That doesn't make them anymore or less professional than I am. I can act as professional.

The concept that Professionalism was more than the work I put out had never crossed my mind before. Having the ability to recognize the flaw in my thought process showed me that putting the professionalism in my attitude and the way I acted was a tool.

This left me with my greatest fear to overcome.

FEAR OF FAILUR!

I know that there's potential for me to fail, but don't I decide what is considered a failure?

If I allow myself to give up on my goals then I will have failed. Anything more than giving up is a success.

What am I actually afraid of?

If I do fail the only person I am letting down is myself because I have given up. No one else gave up on me. I don't expect others to fear my failure. I should not fear my failure.

If I don't give up I don't fail.

I have struggled in the past with fear of failure (and actual failure) all through my life, personal more than anything. I have the assumption that anything less than resounding success is failure. The fear of judgment, of not being good enough, and not being professional enough are all factors in my fear of failing.

The beginning of a new adventure is always full of fears of all kinds. To each person they are unique to their experiences. Personal and Professional. For me fear has ruled a large part of my life since I was a child. It has stopped me from enjoying opportunities to grow and help those around me grow. Fear became such a part of my life it has affected my mental health on a regular basis.

After taking the time to be honest with myself and not generalize the fears I had about building my own writing career it became clear that I could approach the fears I face in my personal life in the same way.

Am I afraid to put my writing out there? The answer is still yes, but with a greater understanding I am ready to overcome them! I know that I still have a lot of work to do and that I may not ever be fear free but pushing through fear is the definition of being brave.

IT'S MY TIME TO BE BRAVE!

Are there fears that are affecting your life in some way?

Are you ready to face them?

Be sure to subscribe to Inner Inspirations and fallow my journey as I face my fears and chase my dreams. It's possible you will find the inspiration to fallow yours too!

I would love to hear your thoughts on my first blog in the comments.

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